Divorce: Moving Forward And Rediscovering Yourself


Divorce: Moving Forward And Rediscovering Yourself

Written By: Shaundtrya Ganasan, Licensed Counselor (KB11097)


In today’s world, 'Divorce' is becoming a new norm. It was considered taboo back then, and only a few dared to take that path. Even if someone wished to, they had to confront societal pressure, concerns about personal safety, and the continuous responsibilities tied to the upbringing of children throughout their marriage. Like a giant wall, these hurdles often stood in the way of getting a divorce.

Divorce rates have gradually gotten higher in recent decades, among both newlyweds and couples who have been together for many years. The reasons behind these decisions are diverse and complex. Infidelity, communication problems, incompatible goals and values within marriages, marrying too young, unrealistic expectations about a partner or marriage, domestic violence, and financial issues are some common reasons for divorce.

Sometimes seemingly trivial reasons can lead to divorce. The dynamics of relationships have shifted and what one person considers inconsequential may be a deal breaker for another. It demonstrates the shifting viewpoints and objectives in the diverse structure of modern relationships.

Reminder: If you or your loved one are struggling with relationship issues, please don't hesitate to reach out to us at Soul Mechanics KD or Soul Mechanics Ipoh.
Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but strength!

What is DIVORCE?

Divorce is more than just a word; it is a profound legal procedure that systematically and formally discloses the thread of a once-shared bond. It is the official dissolution of a marriage, signifying the end of a key chapter in the intertwined journey of two people.

This legal procedure entails more than simply paperwork and court hearings; it is a difficult path that includes the division of shared assets, the determination of child custody, and the establishment of financial support agreements. It is a procedure that demands negotiating emotional complexities as well as legal challenges, to achieve a new beginning for both parties involved.

Divorce is a life-changing journey that requires reflection, resilience, and a desire to embrace change. It's a lot more than just a legal termination; it's a turning point in the personal stories of a person who encounters it, changing the direction of their lives in ways they may have never expected. In simple terms, divorce is the official recognition that two people's paths, previously united in marriage, are now destined to move in separate ways.

Reminder: If you or your loved one are struggling with relationship issues, please don't hesitate to reach out to us at Soul Mechanics KD or Soul Mechanics Ipoh.
Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but strength!

What Happens Post-Divorce?
Emotional Rollercoaster

Divorce can trigger a wide range of emotions, including grief, rage, relief, regret, sadness and uncertainty. These sensations tend to happen when you go through a major life change. The psychological and emotional consequences may last beyond the legal procedures and often lead one to experience depression, anxiety, and other mental health concerns. It's not only about the end of a marriage; it's also about the massive chaos that shakes the entire foundation of your emotional landscape.

Grieving Process

Divorce, for many, is a loss of something precious in their life. It involves grieving. For some, it involves grieving their lost years of happiness and self. Different people grieve for different reasons while undergoing divorce.

Self - Discovery

After divorce, you also get a chance to discover yourself and your lifestyle. This phase is not just about the loss of a relationship; it’s an opportunity for personal growth, reconsidering priorities, and achieving long-held goals and desires. Post-divorce provides one with opportunities to explore other personal fulfilments, try solo travels, and pursue new interests and hobbies. It's an opportunity to enhance resilience, and self-discovery, and be in search of your authentic self.

Financial Adjustments

For some divorce downsizing their double-income family structure to a single salary might cause some financial hardship. It requires making difficult decisions like downsizing living arrangements. It's not simply emotional adaptations; there are also practical aspects that come into the picture, including creating new budgets, tackling the complex process of property splitting, and handling new financial commitments. While undergoing psychological and emotional changes, divorce requires one to be mindful of financial rebalancing which requires them to be courageous and have strategic planning.

Co-parenting Challenges

Despite the financial aspects, if there are children involved, divorce may cause a major change in parenting arrangements, changing parental roles, and necessitates. For the creation of successful co-parenting practices—communication and cooperation with an ex-spouse are crucial.

Therefore, by working together and establishing clear guidelines and routines, parents can help create a stable and supportive environment for their children, even after the divorce. This can minimize conflict and provide a sense of security and stability for the children during the challenging time of transition.

Reminder: If you or your loved one are struggling with relationship issues, please don't hesitate to reach out to us at Soul Mechanics KD or Soul Mechanics Ipoh.
Remember, seeking help is not a sign of weakness but strength!

Reestablishing Social Networks

Divorce often reshapes social circles, causing changes in ties with mutual friends and extended family members. Reestablishing the existing social networks and managing social interactions as a single person serves a distinct set of challenges that can cause one to seek alternative sources of support. Although divorce might lead to new relationships and possibilities, it is essential to understand that this path may not be uniform. Some individuals may find comfort and support in new relationships, while others struggle with the challenges of recreating social networks. Recognising the various effects of divorce on social ties further facilitates the process of personal and social rebalancing.

Dating and Relationships

After divorce, certain individuals may choose to re-enter into dating life, whereas others might prioritise self-reflection and personal growth before embarking on new romantic relationships. Once divorce is finalized, both parties are legally free to remarry or pursue other relationships. This newfound freedom allows individuals to explore new romantic possibilities and find happiness in their personal lives.


The post-divorce era becomes a canvas for self-discovery, with the opportunity for personal growth and the chance to build stronger and healthier future relationships. It is a moment where you have been given the power to create your own stories and find joy as you turn the pages of your life.

Physical and Mental Health Well-being

Divorce can take a toll on mental and physical well-being. Taking care of yourself and establishing good routines is important during the recovery period. However, it is important to note that the emotional healing process may take time. If you recognise the need for support, you can seek friends, family, or professionals to help you navigate through this transitional period.

Moving On

Over time, you may find a sense of closure that can help you move on and start a new chapter in your life. It includes intentional adaptation of new habits, the establishment of new goals, and embracing the changes that come. The path towards closure can be very personal and unique for everyone. This process includes the continuous venture into possibilities, instilling a sense of independence and the hope of a better tomorrow.


Remember that the post-divorce process can be tough but what matters is how you embrace yourself in this journey. There aren't any uniform guidelines for coping, but getting support is an important step forward. Reach out to friends, and relatives, or seek a therapist's assistance. Therapy can be an essential resource for emotional healing and navigating the major shifts that come with divorce.

If you’re looking for a therapist in Kota Damansara or Ipoh area, you can click here for more information.

If you enjoyed reading this, why not broaden the horizon of knowledge by learning about "How Couple Therapy Can Create More Fulfilling Relationships?"? You can read the blog here.

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